First Day On Job Tomorrow and I Fracture My Toe

Have you ever heard of Murphy’s law? It’s this Irish thing where everything that could possibly go wrong. . . goes wrong. For example you’re in a hurry to get to work and you end up behind an old lady doing half the speed limit. You’re going nuts as you shout in a fiery uncontrollable voice  “on any other day when I don’t need to be somewhere, this doesn’t happen and I don’t run into old ladies.”

My first day on the job as a salesman for a major company is tomorrow. It involves a lot of walking and this genius decides to walk into a suitcase and fracture his pinky toe. 

I’ve got a 9 hour shift tomorrow which involves walking all day. I decide to buddy tape the toes with bandage and tape. This prevents the bone from moving and helps it to heal. 

Another trick you can do is to lie down with your feet raised high. This method decreases blood flow to the broken area which decreases swelling and inflammation which can add to the painful experience. 

Why My God do you allow this to happen? You surely do like to send the dark clouds my way that I may be rained upon. I guess it’s nothing compared to what your saints went through but I take this opportunity to lift up my suffering this week as an offering for the souls of those killed in the Orlando shooting. 

Dear God if you sent this broken toe as a trial to test my patience, please know that I’ve already failed. I’m miserable right now but I love you,

Your miserable son,

Stephen 

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