On Avoiding Problematic People

I get a few people ask my advice for various things but this week seems to be the theme of ”what should I do…avoid this person or continue to engage with them?”

I don’t know why they want my advice but some people ask. I’ve one woman whose husband is continuing to live an open  and double life of adultery and is very violent.

I’ve another who has a guy he met who he claims would make the SSPX branch of the Church look like liberals.

The first woman felt that because she should learn to forgive and couldn’t let go of what she had that somehow if there was a separation she’d be committing a great sin.

I told her she needs to make a clean and clear choice to leave him and separate. It’s not a sin to separate only to divorce someone. He needs to go and sometimes Jesus removes not only ourselves but others from our lives and leaves them to their own demise and the innocent victim can then move on whilst the unrepentant man is left with his conscience and Gods justice to deal with until he returns.

God won’t abandon him but he will always continue to call him back to his senses but in the meantime its important you remove him or yourself and children from the house.

She’d exhausted all other avenues and he won’t go to counselling so it’s clear the choice he’s made.

The second guy met someone who he felt had such extreme controversial views that he had to sever all ties with. Then the guy followed him around.

He was wondering if he did the right thing and he did. We should always remove these folks from the scene and leave them to the prayers of the saints not to mention our own.

He then said he kept creating scenarios in his head where the guy shows up to his work and goes crazy at him. apparently this ultra traditionalist Catholic is not altogether there and the drawer is short of a spoon or two.

You see the devil does this, he plays on your weaknesses and ignorance or rather your conditioning and programming by secular society. We’ve all been programmed to become anxious when we feel threatened and worry about what others think of us.

My friend was feeling anxious and the devil was suggesting scenarios to him by which the guy shows up and disturbs him. in the medical field they call it paranoia and we all suffer from paranoia but such feelings and thoughts are spiritual.

I’m no expert in discerning spirits. However sometimes the scenarios we dream up can come true. When they come true and came to pass one still has to wonder if it came from the devil or was it Divine Grace and God helping us and preparing us for the worst.

It’s so difficult to know who is who in spiritual warfare and without a spiritual guide one has to feel their way through the dark for themselves which is what St.Anthony had to do. but whatever the case may be, anxiety does not come from God because perfect love casts out fear altogether.

So if our paranoia or dreams are the result of anxiety one has to wonder. . .

My advice to him was simply that its ok and God has allowed it to make you stronger in the faith but don’t be afraid to admit your weaknesses before God and avoid him. If it all gets too much just let him know outright you’d rather not be friends.

We are called to work out our own salvation and if there’s a bug that’s a threat to the fruit then we must squash it before the whole vineyard is ruined and we’re back to square one.

We are all at different spiritual levels in our lives and we need to protect what we have and admit we are not the spiritual giant we’d like to be just yet.

God bless





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